Thursday, July 9, 2009

Home at last

It was really a wonderful trip and it was so nice to come home on Saturday afternoon. The cats looked well-cared for and seemed to have missed us. Being greeted by 100 degree weather was a shocker for everyone but otherwise we are happy to be home. It was a wonderful trip, relaxing, heartwarming and generally fun. Even the kids behaviors were pretty awesome after the first days in PA. In fact, we felt almost "normal" (whatever that is) much of the time.

Of course, there was a downside to coming home--RAD behaviors creeped up rushed back as though they had been waiting right inside the door to greet us. Corazon was hit the hardest. Since we got back she had been an absolute wreck. We had three days of her just being a basket-case about every little task I asked of her. She would stand and scream for no reason whatsoever (well I guess she had a reason-I told her to get dressed) and then she would stop to have a perfectly normal interaction with me for two minutes then restart the screaming. She is highly destabilized and I haven't seen her be this way in quite a long time. That child is stubborn. She has absolutely. refused. to. do. anything. she. is. supposed. to. do. I have tried tapping, rubbing, cuddling & baby time, mini-tramp, jumping jacks, m&m therapy, and letting her be my stick-tight (currently I have 2 of those since Pollito and I are attached at the hip too). Nothing is working for any period of time. I am guessing it's the transition that is messing with her but it's exhausting. The only place that seems to help is going to gymnastics where they work her really hard with three-hour workouts. I was a little worried when I took her on Monday because she had been such a mess but she seemed to calm down and the coach said she had never had a kid come back from such a long break (a month) and be so "on task" and focused. Go figure. So, I scheduled her for a few extra sessions to see if that helps her.

Pollito continues to exhibit some RADish behaviors but with him I am pretty sure it is anxiety and all of the different transitions we have made over the last 6 weeks. Inspired by watching Lisa and Special K I made him my sticktight from the moment we got home. He does everything at my feet or by my side. Everything. He complains a little bit about it but then turns around and asks "Tomorrow can I be you ticktight?" so I think it is working for him. The tantrums, crying, continuous nonsense chatter, grabbing, licking (don't ask), etc. have gone done quite a bit. As soon as we are apart it increases by 1000% (not kidding). I am not sure how long we will keep this up but for now it is working pretty well for him.

Milagro has hit the "terrible twos" with full force. She whines and screams at the drop of a hat which is highly unusual for her. If she doesn't get her way or if we don't understand what she is trying to say she cries. But it is cute that in the midst of her crying I can usually say "Okay BUT don't whine and use your words or signs" and she stops mid-tears, smiles, and slowly turns her eyes towards me like we were playing peekaboo. It's clearly an attention-getting strategy which in this household I cannot totally blame her for using. Other than that the language development is astounding. She hit the point of "no return" about 6 weeks ago when she started repeating every word she heard but now is using most of them correctly. She takes a nightly walk with C. and comes back to "report" on her walk. Last night this was part of her report: "I walking, I nunning, (running) nite-nite fowers, nite-nite dawg. I saw cackkkkktus (cactus) and woks (rocks) and dawg kiss me nite-nite. Mama pat dawg and (k)itty. Saw two fowfie (firefly). Big tuck (s)cared me mom! I say wahhhhhhhhh. [Big smile] See you!" She learned "firefly" and "dragonfly" while we were in Georgia so those are her new favorite words along with "motorcycle." It continues to amaze me to watch how language develops and it is giving me some ideas for dealing with Tortuga's language challenges.

Tortuga was fine while the others were melting down but once I made Corazon my sticktight he needed to have his time to "shine." He is concerning me because I have started seeing an increase in his glee whenever one of the other kids is hurt or having a hard time. We had a peeing incident with Corazon on the return home that caused her great distress and he couldn't stop himself from laughing while it was happening and then grinning ear-to-ear after the fact. A few minutes after than we stopped and Pollito tripped and fell face down and Tortuga was the only "witness." He came running to me laughing and saying that his brother was "so funny." When I found out what happened and asked Tortuga if Pollito was hurt he said "yeah, I guess so" and kept on laughing and grinning as I dealt with Pollito. Since then I have continued to catch him showing these responses but I am also sensing that he is destabilizing slowly so I have a sense that we don't have long before the fall.


BT said...

The licking. Loads of fun, huh? I once spent an afternoon holding a seething 7.5-year old RADish who must have felt terrified by our then amped-up attachment parenting, and while he licked as much of me as he could, he narrarated to his observing younger brother that "mom really loves this, you should do it too." Ugh. You are doing all the right things. Hang in and keep your patience!!!

Ashley said...

Welcome home, I guess? So sorry to hear about Corazon's challenges, and about the escalations of the others...

I love Fowfies too...


Lisa said...

I've got a kid trying to feel me up. Wanna trade? ;-0

Essie the Accidental Mommy said...

Oh no, that is no good.
If I could do it all over again, I would tomato- stake/ sticktight Genea like brown on rice. That is something I had never heard of until way later that would have been exceptionally useful!

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