What is it they say about great laid plans? We had made great plans for Thursday (yesterday.) C. and I were taking the boys to the book fair at their school in the afternoon to get new books. Then we were going to get their favorite takeout and drop them off at my sister's house for the night to hang out with their uncle. The girls (Corazon, Milagro, C & I) were having a "girls' night out" and going out to dinner then off to an Indigo Girls concert. It was planned as a surprise for everyone because the kids don't do well with advance notice on anything. We take Corazon to see the Indigo Girls each year and it is one of her favorite music groups (ours too.) Of course, I took away Tortuga's book fair but we could still do the rest with him, right?
So, yesterday I go to pick up Corazon from school. I had pulled out her old Indigo Girls concert t-shirt so she could wear it to the concert and I was still planning on taking Pollito to the book fair before getting the girls ready to go to dinner/concert. She hops into the car and we see her teacher leaving the school Her teacher comes to the car and asks her if she has given me "the note." Corazon feigns surprise ("what note?") and teacher directs her to run back up to the classroom to get it and fills me in on a relatively minor incident at school that Corazon was asked to tell her parents about in a note and return it to school signed by her parents. She hands me a note that says almost nothing about what she did except that something got torn and that the teacher expects me to sign the piece of paper BUT in the space for my signature there is a big black markout. I ask what it is and I get the following, IN ORDER:
"Uhmm...I think it was there before I wrote the note."
"Uhmm...let me look at it. What the... someone must have written on it and crossed it out."
"Mom, I left it on my desk and I think someone thought it was theirs and wrote on it."
"Oh, I remember, my friend signed it as a joke, and I had to cross it out."
"Mom, I don't know what it is. Believe me. I am telling the truuuuuuth!"
Yep, six times, and still no admission of anything. I calmly said to her that we needed to tell her teacher about these people writing on her stuff and walked her over to her teacher's car. At this point Corazon is bawling and I am
When we got home I made her sit outside to "think" while I went inside to think. It was 86 degrees outside so I was trying to make her uncomfortable too. I told C. what happened and we strategized to see if we could figure out how to reconcile still letting her go to the concert. I wanted so badly to justify it but knew it would send the wrong message not just to her but to her teachers if she went to school tomorrow having gone to the concert. We made the painful decision to not take her but then couldn't figure out what to do with 3 kids staying with my sister because she cannot handle them all in her home (setup is not conducive to what they needed.) After reaching my sister on the phone we were able to change plans and have her come here to babysit but we didn't get to go out to dinner. She was clearly upset that she was missing this and kept saying she wished she could start over. I had her practice what she would have done differently and she did fine. I praised her then sent her to bed at 6p.m. I felt terrible. I so wanted this to be differently but in my heart I knew we couldn't take her. She was so very sad but I think I was even sadder. This is so hard sometimes.